HAPPINESS...

Someone said to me the other day,
that I am unhappy and miserable.
This struck me as strange
because my daily train of thought
has never included
'am I happy or unhappy?'.
And since then,
its been on my mind...
Am I HAPPY? Or more to
the point am I UNHAPPY?

I dont honestly know...am I unhappy?
Aren't we all unhappy at some point in our lives?
Everything cant be perfect.
Bad experiences dont necessarily
make people unhappy.
Thus, since everything cant be perfect
regardless of our actions
and the actions of others,
is it then right to say that we're unhappy?
I dont think we should despair
just because things dont always go our way...
I dont think it makes us happy or unhappy people.

To quote Jonathan Haidt
(author of the book The Happiness Hypothesis) :

"Happiness has a very weak relation
to the events in our lives.
Your happiness level is determined
mostly by the structure in your brain -
not by whether good or bad things happen to you.
Negative events hurt or feel bad,
but they are not usually as bad
as we think and don't last
as long as we think.


Happiness is an individual thing,
like a thermostat in our brains
with a baseline that's predetermined by genetics.
We all move around, up or down,
around our set point depending on life events.
The key to the psychology of happiness
is to move to the upper range of your potential."

A lot of the time...I'm ridiculously happy
and I cant seem to put it into words
because I don't feel like I have the right
to throw it in someone's face.
I have so much to be thankful for
and excited about it doesnt seem fair.
And occasionally I'm really upset
and still I cant put it into words because
I dont feel I have the right to whine and moan..
and with time anything I might worry about disappears...
Does this mean I'm unhappy and miserable?

I guess I'm just this person trying
to find my way in the world.
Always wanting more.
Always pushing myself.
Figuring out what I believe in.
What ideas and ideals I support.
What my 'bottom line' is.
Every once in a while
I forget a stroke or a kick
and I start to sink but then I remember
where my end of the rainbow is
and what I imagine is awaiting me
on that end and everything returns to normal.
I'm not unhappy...
I'm just your average young adult!!