hopeless romantic

A deep yearning to hold the one you love,

but never getting the ability to have.

Existance is a futile effort to remain

sympathetic to those around you,

when you have no sympathy for yourself.

Always loving but never achieving love from someone else

has a long lasting consequence.

You realize how lonely being alive really is.

Despair only if you know what you think is right.

Otherwise you are just a pessimistic fool without a clue.

Love is eternal and will always be with you

but it is up to you to unlock it,

and sometimes it seems like you put too much effort into doing so,

and just when you think you have achieved

the perfection of loneliness you wake up in the night

knowing that there is no one out there that cares anymore.

Two personalities clashing to take the priority

of the human complexity that is known as myself.

The longing to be loved and have respect to fill this egotistical pride,

and the other which has been trampeled on endlessly
that longs to be a loner, to drift from this world and everyone in it.

Just giving into the thoughts is all you can do

when you don't know where to turn.

Emotionless and sadistical,

this enigma of a life is sometimes

the most reckless thing you can imagine,

but you can't help but feel useful

when you know you make a difference in someone's life.

Keeping up with a smile so fake

and a compassion so well hidden

that you don't want to show it to anyone.

Protecting yourself from love

is all you can do sometimes

because hatred and depression consume

when you don't make the right choices

and you are left to reflect on every instance

that you have screwed up in life,

and you know... things aren't right

when they should be.