Lifetime-line

How do people keep track of their lives?
How do you keep track of your life?
Some go through photo albums.

"A picture paints a thousand words"

Yes, but a thousand words of a moment.
Just one moment.
A flash. Milliseconds of your life.
A millisecond of your life takes
a thousand words to describe.

I found an old journal of mine.
A tiny black notebook
that i used to let everything out on.
The last thing i wrote in that notebook:

"You see, the mind is like a river.
It grows long, it goes deep.
The deepest part of the river
is the strongest foundation of our minds.
Since this is the early part of the river,
it is the early part of our lives
- a child's foundations.
Now this river, as it gets longer,
changes the direction it flows through
- the path of the growing mind.
When i think, my thoughts spread finding the answer.
The problem is, my thoughts
- the water held by the river,
spreads too much and reached too far
by force that it seeps through
the soil and disappears
- collapsed by the plains of my own mind.
What i need to do is focus.
Collect my thoughts together
and form a powerful flow
towards the answer"

Reading that journal took me back to the days
It made me think of the things i would change
should i be given a second chance.

"The most painful lesson i have learnt so far
- Life itself goes on"
13th of May, 2001.

It's been over 7 years?
Seven years since i first placed
a piece of my mind in that book.
Alot can happen in seven years.
Seven years can bringabout
uncountable amount of changes.

If i have one wish,
I wish i was 5 years old
with my current mind intact.
(And the ability to control time.
Slow it down, speed it up, etc.
But that's not the point....)

I'm sure most of you have
at one point of time wished
for a second chance at life.
I'm sure you would love to be
5 years old again with your current mind intact.
Do things you should've done before.

If you're reading this,
you must have made
that sort of wish before.

I had a dream when i was 5.
I was a curious little boy.
So curious i kept on wondering
what it would be like when i grow up.
So curious it doesn't leave my head.
I think and think and think about it.
One day, i fell asleep and dreamt all this.
Dreamt so fast that time itself
slows down for me
thus making this life seems longer.
The dream feels to be going by normal time,
but in real life, it's just flashing by.
Here i am, typing away things about my life.
Hoping that my 5 year old self is dreaming it all up.
Hopefully he'll wake up soon
and remember everything.

Life was great when i was 5.
Answers to my questions come to my head.
They come out of nowhere.
I'm almost convinced
that i was smarter at 5 than i am now.

To my 5 year old self.
I would like to say that i haven't forgotten you.
I know you, and i know that i am
almost completely different from you.
I wish i was you
and i wish i was in your position.
I envy you, i respect you.

If everything is a dream,
if i am just a character in your dream,
I know you won't have the heart to wake up.
You've seen me grow for 19 of my years.
I can understand that.
But please do consider my part.
Should all this be your dream,
should you wake up
and make my whole existence disappear,
well i think that now is an excellent time to wake up.

Wake up.
Wake up.
Wake up.

And live your life
in ways i should have.